This video is hard for me to watch because Shorna moves so slowly.
I am also not good at shooting video yet and she doesn’t like me aiming my phone at her. Can you see by her ears and the way she is looking at me?
I cluck at her in the beginning of the video, something I rarely do, because…it doesn’t work and she seems beyond clucking. She perks up her ears to acknowledge me. She does come to me, in her own time. See how slowly Shorna walks, how she lets the water fall from her mouth before she moves. She is capable of great speed and has fast reflexes. She is choosing a pace that is energy-conserving for winter and gives her sure-footedness on the ice. Her pace also seems related to trust-building. If I wait for her, it gives her time to see if it is safe, time to see if I am safe.
More and more I am aware of my short time-patience continuum. This is a 90 second video and I can barely sit through it. Did you find the same after watching?
I timed myself and I give on average five seconds for the horses to respond to me. After five seconds, I move on, change tactics or escalate if I don’t get a response. I also start having thoughts that I am not going to get a response, and this produces feelings of frustration and anger. Wow! I know if I do this to the horses, I must have the same expectation of my family, my friends, myself, of life. My ego is on a five second timer!
I wonder what would happen if I wait longer for life to respond?
What I care most about in this world…takes time…my marriage, my kids’ futures, our farm, my health, my creativity, my friendships, growing tomatoes. Five seconds isn’t long enough to swim in my cup of life, savour it, relish it, be swallowed up and transformed by it. It’s only long enough to look at it.
I am going to start waiting ten seconds and will let you know what happens.
I am learning if I wait, Shorna will come to greet me. She will do what I ask.